lackluster
It's February already… It's way too early to be so burned out on things, but this is where I've found myself already.
A full load of coursework in grad school (9 hours/3 classes) is on my plate each week, which means at least 3 books per week… then add to that teaching. I have 2 classes that I teach two times per week. So, I'm in class roughly 10.5 hours per week, whether teaching or learning. Outside of class, I'm usually reading or prepping to teach. Or sleeping. However, the chances of the latter are usually growing more and more slim as the days go by.
I'm in a mad dash to the finish line of May. I graduate then. But sometime before then, I have to complete and pass my classes, take my comps and pass them (oh and don't forget, prepare for them!), and teach at the same time.
I also just got word that I was accepted for Graduate Research Day, which is a huge honor, and if I win my division, it means prize money and a big honorary notation on my CV (as so does participation). I know I'm in over my head already… but, I'm trimming down a previous paper for this project. See, this is what we do: we combine projects as much as possible… for example: most of my papers for all of my classes all have an urban history twist. Why? I can submit them at any time for an urban history topic if the time every presents itself and still be considered in the realm of an urban historian. Yeah, cheap trick. But, I learned from the masters: my professors.
So, in the mean time, while I'm getting burned out by school already in early February (and school started less than a month ago), chirping at my students (who some, by the way, are the whiniest I've ever seen), I'm sending out this call to remind me in May that all this pain and heartache, this absence from social life, the exhaustion, the burnout… remind me that it was all worth it when I'm graduating, OK?
minor setbacks
It's sad to think that simple things such as the flu that develop into severe things like bronchitis and pneumonia, that become critical enough to keep you down and sick for almost three weeks, including a hospital stay, can make you so far behind in academics, and life. It's amazing to see how such a nagging virus can take toll on your life and make you stressed to the core as you try to catch up… For me, it's not just catching up in grad school; it's also catching up students I'm teaching. Of course, this all occurred in October, just after I got back from New York, but one of the major consequences just hit home.
I've been going at the fastest pace that I can go, and there is no way that I can keep up, and last week, I waved the surrender flag for one of my graduate classes. I'll have to withdraw, which means that I'll either have to take an overload next semester if I teach, teach and take only 2 classes and take the final class in the summer (meaning no graduation ceremony; at my school, on May & December), or take my last three classes in the spring and don't teach. I feel like I'm stuck with a massive decision that I don't want to make. Either way, it's a pretty major consequence that doesn't give me much breathing room for error.
Hah. Breathing room… and that's where it all started… stupid pneumonia.
i got nothing
No, really, I have lots of stories that I could probably tell, but I'm not ready to tell them quite yet.
I will say this… My transition to Birmingham has been a completely different experience so far than I ever expected. I assumed I would be bored and just working and not hanging out with anyone. A month into my transition, and I can tell you this:
- I've joined a trivia team.
- I get to see my family all the time, especially my cutie of a niece who is way too active for my own good.
- I learned how to waltz and swing dance. In a parking lot. Under Vulcan.
- I attended the social event of my year so far when two of my friends got married last weekend.
- I suck at trivia.
- I also suck at the waltz.
- I have laughed more in the past few weeks than I have in the past year.
- I'm learning to brave the heat, because sometimes it's worth the 30 minutes each day for a walk in the park.
- In a month, I've found absolutely nothing to do for work.
- In a month, I've gotten to a place I thought I never could in life (and it's a good thing).
More details to come soon I hope… I do know this: I may not be working just yet (and things are not looking good actually), and while that is discouraging, there are things going on in the periphery that are great and are encouraging and keep me optimistic.
For now, I'll be studying for the GRE to take in August/September, and preparing for Grad School to resume in the fall (and my last 2 semesters… holy cow). And who knows, maybe, just maybe, I'll share the fun stories very, very soon.
