Category Archives: All Things Considered Southern

Aug 30 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Everything Football, Sweet Home Alabama

can you feel it?

I can feel it. It’s in my blood, and it’s part of my soul. This weekend marks the opening of the greatest time of the year, especially for Southerners: college football begins. And we, all of God’s precious football-lovin’ people say, ‘amen.’

There’s nothing quite like football season in the South. For many, the simple reciting of the seasons is: winter, spring, summer, football. It’s the anatomy of the autumn here in the South, and it’s the most highly anticipated sport from the beginning of summer. Everyone scouts out their team’s summer training reports, and they begin to name their personal top 10s, and they know every player like he’s an old buddy from down the street, no matter if you’re 8 or 80. For a Southerner, football is simply part of our DNA.

And there is a reason for its importance, and it lies in two words/three letters: Southeastern Conference (SEC). There is simply nothing quite like SEC football. Match them up against any other conference, and it’s not even an even playing field. In the South, football players are raised from childhood to play for your family’s team: Alabama, Auburn, Georgia, or even Tennessee. All over the South, everyone adorns their favorite colors on Saturdays, whether you’re attending the game or the grocery store… so that everyone knows what side is yours.

And, thankfully, most know of the tradition of Southern football. Even ESPN presented an awe-inspiring article called ‘Pulled Pork and Pigskin.’ The opening image is enough to make a grown man cry. Thanks to an old college buddy/MDB member for the article!

Lastly, but not least… ROLL TIDE ROLL!

Aug 29 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Political Slants

the two-year mark

Two years ago, Hurricane Katrina wreaked havoc on the Gulf Coast from Louisiana, through Mississippi, and parts of Alabama. I’m constantly amazed at how the attention is diverted when talking about Katrina. While the eye of the hurricane dodged the city of New Orleans, the amount of rain poured into the city bore too much pressure on the weakness of the levees, and they were broken.

I’m sure that people will get upset with my thoughts on this, but the question has to be asked: what about Mississippi and Alabama? In Mississippi, houses were reduced to mere splinters, and the entire gambling industry in Biloxi put onto land from the bay (and the gambling industry is a large source of revenue for the state of Mississippi). In Alabama, the damage wasn’t quite as intense, but the areas of Gulf Shores and Fort Morgan were compromised. The U.S.S. Alabama was moved from its spot, and the last time it moved was when it was placed there as a monument/museum in Battleship Park. (Here again, Gulf Shores, Fort Morgan, and the U.S.S. Alabama are huge revenues for the tourism industry in Alabama.

What happened in New Orleans is horrific, and the images I saw during the catastrophe will never leave my mind, or the minds of many others. Those alive during Katrina were also alive to see the chaos and brutality of September 11. This is a generation that has seen the slaying in many innocent. My problem with the issue is that the focus of Katrina has been (for 90% of the coverage) in New Orleans. Here on the second anniversary of the hurricane, there have been no press opportunities of other localities, and no national push to rebuild the other areas.

Of course, there are conspiracy theories that say that the reason that Mississippi and Alabama had no problems with rebuilding is because of the partisan connections with the governors (both republican) and the President, also saying that the reason that the federal government did not respond to New Orleans faster was because of partisan tensions between Gov. Kathleen Blanco (D-LA) and President Bush. There is no evidence yet to show any of this, but it does make everyone wonder just how the hurricane affected each state and how they were able to rebuild.

As a simple bystander (via the television) for the media outlets, I’m surprised at how open President Bush claims he is, and yet his press conference was not open to the public, or even to residents of New Orleans. There were few African Americans represented in that room, which heavily conflicts with the actual population representation. It also bothers me that for a mayor who did so little during the hurricane, Mayor Ray Nagin was re-elected and placed back into a powerful position in which he did nothing in a time of crisis.

While I do not live on the coast, I am greatly affected by hurricanes living within a few hours from the coast. When they hit landfall, especially in Alabama, tornadic storms begin to form within the conditions and continue to destroy the land in different forms. Alabama has been hit many times by hurricanes, and it has a plan for each time, before and after. Other states are the same. My question to Louisiana is: why didn’t you have a plan? You have been prophesied that when the ‘Big One’ hit, you’d sink. Why didn’t you do more? Why haven’t you done more still? Two years later, the area is far behind the same areas that were hit by the same hurricane.

The aftermath of Katrina is impossible to forget. It is some of the worst damage that I have seen a hurricane make. The onslaught on so many unprepared and left-behind is discouraging – leaving only the question of who could have done more and what still remains to be done. I don’t believe that New Orleans is back to normal, as many commercials state. Maybe the upper class areas are back… but the other side of town is also a ghostly reminder that part of the city has been forgotten, almost intentionally.

Jun 30 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Ins-and-Outs

migraine-ology

So, politics and history aside, I’m still doing research. I’m just researching additional information: migraines.

Before you think you know what migraines are all about, don’t. They’re not ‘really bad headaches.’ They are actually a neurological disorder. It sounds all creepy and horrible, and it can be, depending on the level that you’ve had.

Migraines are largely hereditary. Most people don’t just develop them out of the blue. And, they have more to do with than just head pain and nausea. I, unfortunately, suffer from a rather high level of pain, and a disorder aptly named ‘complex confusional migraines.’ Basically, what happens is that they are complex in that they can spawn from any minute pain and are complex in nature, causing a great number of side effects. They are confusional because they literally send crazy messages to your brain and cause debilitating side effects, such as temporary paralysis.

I can usually detect when they are coming on full-blown now, and have only experienced full-out CCMs 3 or 4 times in my life. The countdown to them, however, I have experienced more times than I care to count. The beauty is trying to prevent them, of which I have been through many medications (and still working on them) that will be the right fit. Onset meds are also helpful. The one that I lean upon heavily though is only in emergency situations, because I have to give myself a shot. The kicker? I hate needles. Since I’ve had to do this, I’ve completely had to sympathize for those that have to take insulin shots. Needles… ugh.

Anyway, part of the research that I’m doing has to do with food triggers. I’ve had more frequent and intense migraines than I’ve had before, and I eat much better than I did in high school. But, many of the food that I eat are on a suggested triggers list. Part of my history has been to kind of go the eat-good-carbs, don’t-eat-bad-carbs direction. But, I fear that artificial sweetners might be the death of me. So, after examining this list, I’m going to have to see a dietician it seems to keep from yo-yoing with the whole thing.

Or, I can go vegetarian. Or actually, to be more precise: vegan. Dairy and egg products are also on the trigger list. The thought of going vegan seems great to me, until I look at a menu at a restaurant or think about a family gathering and see how difficult it might be to actually do it in the South. The South revolves around good meat… I mean, barbecue is our claim to fame. And, I’m not gonna lie, I love it. I just don’t know if I can give it up. That’s my only beef with going vegan. Ahhh, puns.

Stress is also a contributing factor in my case. And because I’m not big on breathing exercises, I’m joining into the yoga classes at the rec. I mean, for me, the OCD schedule freak, it’s great. They meet at the same time 3 times a week. It’s fabulous!

But seriously. The migraines are seriously interfering with my reading and are part of the reasong that I headed back to Alabama, because they were literally putting me in the hospital every few months (ask Sassy). So, for now, I’m trying to find a good situation that will help minimize these monsters.
Just a peek into everyday life for me, the Muse.

Jun 26 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Sweet Home Alabama

you know you’re from alabama when…

Thanks to the kind e-mail forwarding characteristics of my best friend, I’m able to share a hilarious version of 20 ways to know that you’re an Alabamian… Enjoy!
1. You can properly pronounce Arab, Cahaba, Opelika , Sylacauga, Oneonta and Eufaula.

2. You think people who complain about the heat in their states are sissies.

3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.

4. You know that the true value of a parking space is  not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.

5. Stores don’t have bags or shopping carts, they have sacks and buggies.

6. You’ve seen people wear bib overalls at funerals.

7. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.

8. You measure distance in minutes. (It’s about 5 minutes down the road)

9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.

10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.

11. You know cowpies are not made of beef.

12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.

13. You have known someone who has a belt buckle bigger than your fist.

14. You aren’t surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, beer, and bait all in the same store.

15. A Mercedes Benz isn’t a status symbol. A Chevy Silverado Extended Bed Crew Cab is.

16. You know everything goes better with Ranch Dressing, or ketchup.

17. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.

18. You actually get these jokes and are “fixin’” to send them to your friends.

19. You have used your heater and air-conditioner in the same day.

Finally: You are 100% Alabamian if you have ever had this conversation:
20. “You wanna coke?” “Yeah.” “What kind?” “Dr Pepper.”

Jun 24 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Everything Football, Sweet Home Alabama

religion

Today as I was driving (now a mandatory part of everyday for me), I saw a billboard that simply stated:

I believe in football.

And all of the South’s great citizens say, amen.

You see, football is a completely religious experience in the South. Of course, I’m not preaching to the choir, just making an observation on the differences of the South to other parts of the country. I know that there are great football traditions all over the country (see: Notre Dame, Penn State, UCLA, Texas, etc.), but football is an altogether different type of experience.

In the South, rivalries are pitted based solely on the geographic region from which someone has been born. If you grow up in Tennessee, chances are you’ll root for the University of Tennessee, to which every Alabama fan will scowl by the third sentence of the conversation. If you were born in Louisiana, there’s a great chance that you’re an LSU fan, to which every other SEC team fan will become an enemy at first mention.

It’s amazing to see the contrasts once you’ve been out of the region.

I’m not saying that I’m apart from it either. Now that I am back in Alabama, I look forward to nothing more than being in Tuscaloosa for game day and cheering alongside 92,000 other die hard fans, hoping that Alabama will this year clinch its 13th National Championship. There is nothing like Alabama football.

To be honest, there’s nothing greater than SEC football.

The Southeastern Conference holds some of the greatest football traditions, players, and coaches. Once players are a part of the SEC, they come back to coach, to root, to pass on that love of the greatest sport alive to their children and grandchildren. And the fans are the same way: they spread the tradition to their heirs – and a rich inheritance it is to each recipient.

And while the teams are in summer workouts (in horrific heat, by the way), Alabama fans, players, and coaches alike look forward to that first weekend in September when the video will play, and everyone in the stadium will hear the words of former/late coach Paul W. ‘Bear’ Bryant as he says, ‘I ain’t never been nothin’ but a winner.’ Then, the elephant smashes through the logo and we all hear the powerful words, ‘This IS Alabama football.’ It’s a religious experience, sending chills down your spine, and it will make a believer of anyone in attendance.

I agree with that billboard, and I’m a proud follower, because I do believe in football.

Jun 21 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Political Slants, Sharing Our Nation's Cap-i-tal, Social Quandaries

seer-suckers

If you didn’t know, today is an eventful day in the Senate. No, it’s not set in stone each year, but it’s a tradition that has been introduced by current Senate Minority Whip Trent Lott (R-MS).

Seersucker Thursdays. And this year’s event falls on June 21.
Yep, seersucker. It’s been a longstanding fabric of the Deep South because of its light color and thin sturdy texture. Tradition lies on seersucker… as does a sort of southern aristocracy. And, many members of Congress have participated in this fabulous tradition. See last year’s group…

Sadly, many members of Congress don’t understand the rules of seersucker. It’s best donned with white bucks (shoes) than dark shoes… and of course, light pastel colors to coordinate with the seersucker.

If you need any additional explanation, see the description of Lott’s beloved ‘Seersucker Thursdays’ in the past years. Even the women are included in the fun… the article mentions that Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) purchased suits for women that didn’t have a seersucker suit so that it wasn’t a male dominated event.

So, join in the fun! You’ll be sucked in by the material’s ability to breathe and inability to absorb the heat. And it’s a great way to show your southern pride and flair without pledging your loyalty (for those yanks that may enjoy the South and afraid to vocalize).
They don’t call ‘em suckers for nothin’!

Jun 12 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Ins-and-Outs, Sharing Our Nation's Cap-i-tal, The Salty Ham

may i re-introduce you?

Now that I’ve been back to the city of Birmingham for about 3 weeks now, it’s amazing how much I forgot. However, maybe forgot is a horrible description of my readaptation to southern life. Maybe I should say evolved… but not necessarily in a good way.

When you live in Washington, D.C. (or any large urban center), you quickly learn to forget about the world around you… You don’t speak to folks walking down the street, and quite often you don’t even speak when spoken to. You just go on about your world, get to your destination, enjoy said destination, and you’re on your merry way. It’s nice, actually, and much more enjoyable than it sounds… especially when you have some of the stranger wanderers amidst.

However, in Alabama, and more generally, the South, it’s rude to not at least acknowledge someone’s presence with a hello or a head-nod. And, it’s beyond belief to not speak back to someone who has acknowledged your presence. I find it quite difficult to reacclamate myself to the general strangerly kindness that the South has proudly proclaimed.

Then, there are the highways… I told many before I left that I was worried about the insane level of road rage that exists here. Maybe it has to do with Talladega’s proximity; I don’t know. But, since I’ve re-entered the South (as soon as I got to the Tennessee state line), I’ve been almost run over, crashed into, and run off the road nearly a dozen times. In D.C., you get honked at and/or flipped off, and you’re done. No dice here… it’s revenge if you pull into a lane before someone wants you to do so. It’s scary stuff.

My other favorite part of drivers here are the license plates and bumper stickers. One said crazy driver that sped past me going about 80 in a 35 mph zone had “John 15:5″ on their license plate. Did I forget to mention that he then ran a red light and then through a parking lot to avoid an intersection? He promptly parked at the police station, and hopped out in his full uniform. Whaddya know… a Christian police officer that just broke 4 laws in one swift maneuver. It always ends up that way… the people who are the rudest and most violent tend to have the most ‘gracious’ stickers and tags. Go figure…

While there are definitely cons once you’ve adapted to city life, there are the quaint things that you tend to forget about. Namely, Lynard Skynard. I’ve heard some kind of Skynard music at least once (if not many more times) a week in my various destinations. Today’s episode included the local Winn-Dixie grocery store (and good grief with the expensive groceries AND the sales tax – 10%). I forgot how nice it was to have no grocery tax in Maryland…

I think the largest adjustment I’ve had to make is the time difference. While I have gained an hour in transferring from Eastern Standard Time to Central, my brain is all confused since I learned TV show times in EST. And while I’ve changed it 3 times, it seems that my VCR/DVD player has refused to take on CST, preferring to readjust itself to EST (even with the auto adjust settings turned off). Thank God for TiVo or I’d be doomed.

It’s taking me a lot longer to readjust here than it did to adapt to Washington, D.C. Being homesick for the district also doesn’t help the process…

Jun 05 0 comments
All Things Considered Southern, Political Slants, Sharing Our Nation's Cap-i-tal, Voices of the Past

southerners and their unashamed pride

I couldn’t help but laugh a little when the following was overheard in D.C.:

Unaware Peppy Girl: “I didn’t know you worked for Strom Thurmond!”
Senior Staff Member: “Oh I didn’t, I just know one of his old staffers.”
UPG: “Oh cool. We went to the same school. Yep, we both went to Clemson!”
SSM: “Oh that’s cool.”
UPG: “Yay! Anyway he’s one of my favorite dead people… besides Jesus.”

Oh, wow… Strom Thurmond as a favorite dead person and almost equated to Jesus. I mean, they were basically the same person right? Racist? Discriminating? Obnoxious? I mean, yeah, they’re just alike. Thurmond could basically be the father of the faith… of course, in the South, some people distinguish him in that manner in reference to white supremacy, which is not to be proud of, in my own opinion.

If only some people realized their words before they spurt them out. But, of course, it’s called word vomit for a reason, I suppose.