lackluster
It's February already… It's way too early to be so burned out on things, but this is where I've found myself already.
A full load of coursework in grad school (9 hours/3 classes) is on my plate each week, which means at least 3 books per week… then add to that teaching. I have 2 classes that I teach two times per week. So, I'm in class roughly 10.5 hours per week, whether teaching or learning. Outside of class, I'm usually reading or prepping to teach. Or sleeping. However, the chances of the latter are usually growing more and more slim as the days go by.
I'm in a mad dash to the finish line of May. I graduate then. But sometime before then, I have to complete and pass my classes, take my comps and pass them (oh and don't forget, prepare for them!), and teach at the same time.
I also just got word that I was accepted for Graduate Research Day, which is a huge honor, and if I win my division, it means prize money and a big honorary notation on my CV (as so does participation). I know I'm in over my head already… but, I'm trimming down a previous paper for this project. See, this is what we do: we combine projects as much as possible… for example: most of my papers for all of my classes all have an urban history twist. Why? I can submit them at any time for an urban history topic if the time every presents itself and still be considered in the realm of an urban historian. Yeah, cheap trick. But, I learned from the masters: my professors.
So, in the mean time, while I'm getting burned out by school already in early February (and school started less than a month ago), chirping at my students (who some, by the way, are the whiniest I've ever seen), I'm sending out this call to remind me in May that all this pain and heartache, this absence from social life, the exhaustion, the burnout… remind me that it was all worth it when I'm graduating, OK?
