I used this phrase in a comment in my friend Jill’s journal, just in reference to the fact that I had not gotten to actually hang out with anyone lately because of my hectic schedule.

Today, especially in my reading last night regarding the theory of social gospel, the phrase took a spiritual meaning. I went to a different church this morning, just in the need to feel enlightened, as I have not been so in the past few months. Church has seemed sore and hardened lately. My theory was that I may have just missed a traditional liturgical service. Not that I don’t love contemporary worship, but there are only certain formats that are appealing to me, and they usually fall along the post-modern and emergent paths. I like the contemplative mood… I think that is why I like traditional liturgy.

Anyways, I went to First Church downtown. I was a little worried… just because it is a very old church, and I wasn’t so sure about the pastor… He just seemed like he might be like the rest of his generation, one of the warm toasty sermon styles that just spill over about the goodness of God. Yes, God is good… but that doesn’t explain the human life and relationship to a deity. This morning, I was blown away by the pastor’s message of the impact of a social gospel. He brought in contexts of the here and now, and challenged traditional thought. The text was simple. It was Jesus’ message to love God with all of our mind, heart and soul, and love our neighbor as ourself. I’ve never heard it preached the way he did it. It was moving… I haven’t felt that moved to action in such a long time.

But, my favorite thing that he said was about going against the grain, feeling as though you are even against the flow of mainstream Christianity (boy, shouldn’t that be contradictory). He said:

Don’t worry about having a bleeding heart… the only heart that isn’t bleeding is dead.

Wow. It hit me like a tons of bricks. In being referred to as a liberal bleeding heart, I no longer feel defensive. It makes me feel alive. It justifies my concern for the needs of those who have none.

I will never see that passage the same again.

I will visit First Church again… next Sunday. I loved seeing a minister unafraid of stirring thoughts or feelings. He didn’t sugar coat the gospel. But at the same time, he was never condemning or reaching a hell-fire-and-brimstone speech. It was the gospel alive and well. Convicting. Compelling. Merciful. Compassionate. Disciplined. Challenging.

That is what faith is about. Faith compels us to action, regardless of stereotype, race, gender or kind, continuing through suffering and strife but through joy and love. It is constant. It is truth.