wise words.
today has definitely been a little random. and i liked it. it was much better than i was feeling last night. not as lonely, and for that i'm thankful. even if thanksgiving is over. 
classes today weren't too bad. in english lit, i think my professor was surprised that i've kept up with reading despite my absences. she quizzed me on the entire thing in front of the class, asking what had happened next. we read james joyce. lemme tell you… not too bad, but it was a little strange sometimes. i'm not too big of a fan. since my paper will be late, she gave me an opportunity to make up the grade with some extra credit on this reading or on virginia woolf. i think i shall choose the latter. but, good news… at least i thought so.
astronomy was boring as crap. i think that the 3 1/2 hours of sleep last night didn't help. the only thing that caught my attentions was when he mentioned st. augustine… we're talking about the big bang theory, and he said that someone had asked st. augustine what he thought God did before he created heaven and earth… st. augustine responded, he was creating hell for those who ask questions like that. that woke me up a little… but it did help to get out of class and go to lunch. trevor and tracy were there… no mary or bess, and that made me sad. but i did have a great time. especially when tracy… wait, i think i'll keep that story between the ones present for a while. sorry.
i left to go chat with my art history professor. i missed last thursday, and we were supposed to have our exam. but apparently it didn't happen, and she emailed me about making it up later already. so i finally found her and ended up not having class because the test was today and i had no clue. so i got out of class at… oh yeah, 12:30. that gave me time to pick up a check from trinity… not as much as i hoped for, but it will work… and time to get it in the bank before 2 p.m. rock it out.
i headed to the library to check out some books (and pay my fines… oops). i checked out 'my life' by bill clinton and 'a people's history of the united states' by howard zinn. then, i decided to go to the mall for some downtime. new york & co. had a great sale, and i picked up 2 new pairs of pants and 2 sweaters for work. i then splurged and bought 'america: the book' because i've been wanting to read it. oh wait, that's not all i splurged… i went and got a mocha from barnie's and then a cheesecake brownie from the cookie place. whoops. i'll work on it by eating salads all week.
i went to visit brett on my way out. it worked out perfectly! fun times at the priester's kiosk. yay! thanks for chatting brett.
i came home, and i've chatted with both melissa's tonight. wow. crazy stuff. melissa s. starts her new job at an architecture firm tomorrow in downtown. woohoo, lunches are sure to be set! and just so you know, i'm not so happy that they've moved sex and the city back to 9 p.m. on tuesday nights… not o.k. at all. i liked it early so that i could get in the bed. but tonight, that won't happen. i have to watch it. ha ha.
so here's some music news for you if you want to pop into birmingham (and, hint, hint, go with me…):
friday the 3rd, drew emmitt and candlewyck @ workplay, 9 p.m.
saturday the 11th, jump little children @ workplay, 9 p.m.
tuesday the 14th, suburban love junkies & gavin degraw @ the barking kudu, 7:3o p.m.
thursday the 30th, stewart mayfield project @ workplay, 9 p.m.
*of course, tomorrow night is the presidents of the united states of america @ zydeco, 9 p.m. but, i have classes on thursday, so i'll just want to go to sleep i'm sure.
tomorrow is the day i've been waiting for, for about 2 weeks now. i hope it goes well. and also to more inspirational/interesting posts. this one is boring as crap. ugh.
and if you didn't know…
<center><table width="50%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td width="16.67%" bgcolor="#ff1524"> </td><td width="16.67%" bgcolor="#d20e0a"> </td><td width="16.67%" bgcolor="#ae1f12"> </td><td width="16.67%" bgcolor="#7f2000"> </td><td width="16.67%" bgcolor="#584c10"> </td><td width="16.67%" bgcolor="#ff0000"> </td></tr><tr><td colspan="6" align="center">bob dylan is love</td></tr><tr><td colspan="6" align="center"><small>brought to you by the <a href="http://www.dutchfurs.com/~haze/islove/">isLove Generator</a></small></td></tr></table></center>
sleepless nights.
i think i'm exhausted, and i go to bed. and what do i do for 30 minutes? toss and turn… so i turn to livejournal. strange, yes.
the past few days have been lonely. i don't know how i feel about that. i've talked to people, and seen people, and been out and about, but i feel lonely and empty. and i hate to even say it, but i've got lots of self-depreciation going on inside. i know it would get better if i just let it go and have a good cry, but there's no way i can cry… but i want to so badly, just so i don't feel like i have no emotion.
'in a world that stills questions the problems yet to be solved, through it all, holy one, cover me.'
i feel really unworthy right now of what i have and am, and not in a good way. i know there's a way to be humble, but this isn't what i'm talking about… it's a feeling of worthlessness really. like i don't really have a place in life. anywhere. and i don't know why or what happened to make me feel that way. i've just felt this way since before thanksgiving, but just unwilling to put it out there.
'you can have my heart, if you don't mind the broken things. you can have my life, if you don't mind these tears.'
i feel cold, and like i have a heart of stone. nothing has really moved me greatly like it did last week. church was great and i took away so much, but still, it didn't make the dent i needed. i think that is why i feel so negatively about thanksgiving this year. i'm jealous of those who have such great tales and stories. i saw glimmers of inspiration for only a short while. why did i have to turn away thinking that it was enough? why do i always have to think i know what is best for me? chances are, i don't. and i didn't in this case.
regardless of work, church, whatever, i've got to get out of this threatening hole that seems to yank every bit of life out of me. i know what it is. i want out, and i need out of here. but i can't leave right now. i have so much to get under my feet, and stabilize. i need reinforcements. i need voices of reason around me. here, i'm stuck with close-mindedness. it drives me crazy, and it's overbearing. no lie, there is a countdown to freedom of these burdens as we speak. it's the countdown that will relieve my mind and soul. i think i know why i've turned cold lately, because i've tried to ignore the situation at hand to avoid conflict. turmoil only makes it worse… i'd rather just ignore this one until my freedom allows me to move on… or out in this case.
but for now, i have to find a way to stay sane. if i don't find some way soon, i'll scream. at least i've got a few things coming up that should take my focus away from it. the new job, choir, and upcoming school in january should be great distractions… at least to keep me away from this hole for 12+ hours a day. and, not to mention, 3 of my best friends moving to birmingham in the next month. that should definitely help. if need be, i can always crash on their couch. that would be a blessing from heaven.
gloria.
i love days like this, but i hate them too. ironic, eh?
today was super busier than most of my sundays. this morning, choir at the 11:00 service. it was great. however, i didn't get a chance to do what i always do during worship… take notes of the sermon. i felt like i was sticking out so bad up in the choir loft, so i put my notebook away. i just kept feeling like every eye in the sanctuary was watching me. and i just wanted to throw up… so, i guess i'll get a copy of the sermon and listen to it again. it was really good.
i love advent.
tonight was 'hanging of the greens.' it was fantastic. very traditional, more so than i've ever seen. but it was absolutely beautiful. i was so nervous about singing john rutter's 'gloria.' it makes handel's 'messiah' look like a cakewalk. i could just feel like i was gonna be the biggest goof, and have an unplanned solo. but i ended up doing ok i guess. especially considering the first time i ever looked at the music was tuesday night. i figure if i can do that, then choir will be pretty easy… 
i hated today though, because it didn't feel like a normal church day. so many of my friends and acquaintances were m.i.a. today… because of holidays, cancelled sunday school, and just randomness, i only saw 2 people from my sunday school class all day. so today felt very cold socially. and i didn't like that at all. but, it was only PART of the day, so no big. next week is the bishop! woohoo. can't wait.
'the only thing to do is jump over the moon.'
i think i found out one reason why the rent soundtrack is appealing. other than wailing to it in the car, it's obviously building up my dreams and hopes and all… it's making me think bigger. that could be a good thing. but a bad thing too. i don't want to always have dreams that will always be just dreams. at some point, it would be nice to make those reality. at least some of them anyways.
one of my all time favorite movies is on comedy central. i love 'orange county.' jack black, pure genius.
'now i'm on my way…'
i have 3 rolls of film to get developed from friday. it was absolutely beautiful outside. i finally pinpointed a theme too. and it's known by some. i can't wait… now that i have some kind of direction, it will come out so much easier. i just need to work on it. well, that and the rest of my classes. only 4 classes left of my undergrad career at alabama. wow, if only i was graduating. we'll see what happens at uab. let's hope for good things.
tomorrow is my last day at p.d.o. at trinity. it'll be sad, but exciting. wednesday can't get here soon enough.
thankful reflections.
in looking over my thanksgiving holidays, i realize that i have a lot more on my brain than i give myself credit. not smarts… just thoughts.
thanksgiving was not too shabby. i went to the grandparents' house for the whole family sha-bang. when we got there, it was great to see family. i didn't feel too much like myself though. and i didn't like that. i think i was just annoyed with little things. so i didn't take in thanksgiving like i should have. and for that i feel a little bad. i rode home with my brother, and got to chat with him. that made me feel better… a little more like myself, including all the thoughts of politics and faith and whatnot… and realizing that i'm glad my brother doesn't hold me hostage because of the way i think. i just wish my parents felt the same way. it would be nice.
i found the PERFECT dress for mollie's wedding. it was bangin'. i went to ask if it came in black. no. i was about to cry. BUT, i found it at a store in upstate new york on the internet. so, i'll be ordering it from there. <a href="http://www.thebridalshop.com/The_Bridal_Shop_Bridesmaid/images/bm1912.jpg">wanna see it?</a> lemme know what you think. just remember, it will be in black.
choir practice tonight. can i tell you how much i really enjoy being in the choir? singing is so much fun… i've missed it. all i've been singing lately before now is in my car, belting out crazy stuff… but mostly the RENT soundtrack lately. i'm a fan. i can't let go of it right now. it is familiar in a strange way, and i can't pinpoint it yet.
'what can i do with my obsession, with the things i cannot see? is there madness in my being, is it the wind that moves the trees? sometimes you're further than the moon, sometimes you're closer than my skin. but you surround me like a winter thaw, you've come and burned me with a kiss. and my heart burns for you.' -david crowder… wow, let's just say, can i have said it any better? i am really sad that i missed dc*b at nywc. there's something about crowder lyrics that speak to my soul. maybe i should listen to them more often so that i don't shut off pieces of it. there are so many things that i want to do. i need persuasion though. and confirmation that i NEED to do them, and not just because i want it.
what do i do with all of these thoughts and dreams that right now i mark 'unattainable'? i want everything to fit neatly in a box… having everything organized and ready to go. pre-packaged dreams. are they really dreams? why can't i for the life of me, at almost 25, figure out what i really want in life? will this pass? or will it stay? i'm so excited about my new job, and being able to do what i know that i can do. but, i'm so afraid of what i'll do after… and i think that is why i'm stressed about what to major in for school. why does it have to be such a big deal?
i don't know what to do with all of this… i'm terrified about my future. it completely freaks me out. it never used to do that. i used to have it all planned out. i knew what i wanted. or at least, i thought i knew what i wanted. i know this is elementary, but i am having the hardest time trying to figure out the difference between my wants and my true needs. i mean, my basic needs are taken care of, but in my heart, the things i need, or want for that matter. they all seem to be so big. so far. so out there. which one is which? i wish i could have someone just tell me. i wish it was that simple. i don't know if that even made sense.
so now i'm off to dream a little more, to try to see if anything is really attainable up there in my brain. maybe something will be before too long.
who's been commenting?
<lj-cut text="stalkers."><h4>Who's been commenting in your journal?</h4>
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<td><lj user='emily_dmc'></td>
<td><img src="http://webpages.charter.net/mikenolan/bar.png" width="350" height="10"></td>
<td>234 comments</td>
<td><b>42.24%</b> of total</td></tr>
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<td><lj user='_et_'></td>
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<td>35 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='acochran'></td>
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<td>25 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='_revival'></td>
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<td>24 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='_mcm_'></td>
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<td>23 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='winsty'></td>
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<td>21 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='ful_house'></td>
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<td>20 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='tiny_mite'></td>
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<td><lj user='_hmack_'></td>
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<td>18 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='franklin_arthur'></td>
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<td>15 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='lafalot'></td>
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<td><lj user='eightysixer'></td>
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<td><lj user='bethe'></td>
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<td>8 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='deb_w'></td>
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<td>7 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='c_hartley'></td>
<td><img src="http://webpages.charter.net/mikenolan/bar.png" width="124" height="10"></td>
<td>7 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='_jillyb_'></td>
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<td>Anonymous</td>
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<td><lj user='littlenlauren'></td>
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<td>6 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='phyrablaze'></td>
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<td><lj user='benplh'></td>
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<td><lj user='frisbeemal'></td>
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<td><lj user='nursebuck'></td>
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<td><lj user='chapter1ne'></td>
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<td><lj user='aubietodd'></td>
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<td><lj user='lil_lamb_'></td>
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<td><lj user='xbandannacorex'></td>
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<td><lj user='bessmaria'></td>
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<td><lj user='_tterb_'></td>
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<td><lj user='jennyluann'></td>
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<td><lj user='mattwurtele'></td>
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<td><lj user='odd4god'></td>
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<td><lj user='kleb_werd'></td>
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<td><lj user='hannahsmiles'></td>
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<td><lj user='eternal_fire_'></td>
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<td><lj user='jaycubsfan'></td>
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<td><lj user='carbonigal'></td>
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<td><lj user='elijahwade'></td>
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<td>1 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='rightnutsicle'></td>
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<td>1 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='melody_rogers'></td>
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<td>1 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='princess_lalor'></td>
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<td><lj user='holly1715'></td>
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<td>1 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='luke11'></td>
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<td>1 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='mary_k8'></td>
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<td>1 comments</td>
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<td><lj user='scoats'></td>
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<td><lj user='auburnfan'></td>
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<td><lj user='emmyemmy'></td>
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<td><lj user='fairyfooted'></td>
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<i>These statistics were generated using the <a href = "http://mpn.ath.cx/ljstats">LJ Stats Web Interface</a> by <lj user = "mpnolan">. Original idea from <lj user = "scrapdog">'s <b>LJ Comment Stats Wizard</b></i>.</lj-cut>
in all, give thanks.
well, tomorrow is thanksgiving. i seriously can't believe it's already here. i don't know what happened to the time. anyways. i thought i'd make my list of what i am thankful for this year. so, without further adieu.
<lj-cut text="thanks be to God.">i'm thankful for my mom and dad. they put up with so much crap from me, it's not funny. they are the ones who get the extreme sarcasm, anger, and bitterness when i'm not willing to share it with anyone else. i love them for taking it, and i'm thankful that through all of that, they still love me, and realize that i'm a work in progress. and my deadline is still a long way away. and i'm thankful that they let me be the biggest bum ever.
i'm thankful for my brother. no words can ever explain how wonderful he is, and how much i love him. i don't know what i'd do if i didn't have him for a brother. i think i'd definitely not have any fun with the family, because that's all we do is take cheap shots at each other. i'm glad that he lives only 5 minutes away. having someone like josh keeps me sane.
i'm thankful for my extended family… mamaw & papaw (GG & PP… joke); larry & julia, laurie, sam; bryan & vicki, bryanna; randy & sharon, ben, christen; papaw t & ms. martha; and all the 'friends of the family.' without all these people, my holidays and away time at the lake would be crap. they make it fun, they support me, and love me even if i'm the only non-baptist.
i'm thankful for my best friends with whom i've grown up with… melissa v, melissa s, kellie, jon, sam. and the list could go on. all of these people loved me throughout my high school dorkiness and insanity. and through being the youth director's daughter.
i'm thankful for my best friends from 'bama… mollie, ryan & valerie, matt, brian, christi, and all the fbc ttown folks. and even their snagged spouses or fiances along the way. you guys helped me stay focused and loved me for being the slacker drop out that i was then, and support me for returning to school even though i swear i'm the oldest in all my classes. seriously. and you pick up where we left off every single time we meet up.
i'm thankful for my camp friends. and here, there's probably too many to list. but, i'm so glad that i've gotten the chance to be a part of something real, something of substance, and something that is the definition of community. some of you are closer than others. but regardless, there is a love there than can never be conquered by human means. for that i am thankful. i'm thankful for sumatanga and all the memories it holds for me, but even more for the memories it has held for years past, and for years to come. and for those who make it what it is… from team, to summer staff, to counselors, to campers. it holds a place in my heart that can never be overtaken.
i'm thankful for new friends… who i've met already, who i'll meet in the future, and those who will stay only a season of my journey. every piece of my path is an essential. i pray that all of my endeavors will be as fun and exciting as they already have.
i'm thankful for my new job and for a new destination for classes. for new experiences and for things to come. for not knowing what i want to major in. for having to take back words about school. for getting to take classes after work. for having to get up at the butt-crack of dawn. for having a great paycheck that is soon to come… to pay off what i owe, and to save up for things that are needed.
i'm thankful for laughter. for good times. for prayer. for peace. for suffering and pain. but for healing and wholeness as well. for brokenness, for soma, for whelmed, for 139, for all the moments i've spent just dreaming. there is so much i am thankful for, that i can't put it into words. i'd say i was thankful for everything i have and am. but that isn't true.
i'm definitely thankful that i'm NOT a turkey.</lj-cut>
old age.
i'm beginning to feel the effects of my 25th birthday a month out. what's up with that???
it all started with the job. i'm so excited! but, i feel so different talking about it. today, linda called me and asked me whether i wanted my middle initial on my business cards. what? wow. i'll have business cards when i get there. that's such a change. at riverchase, i didn't have them until 6 months into the job, and i never had them at alex city. now, they'll be there before me. AND, i'll have my own phone number there. talk about crazy.
this past weekend, i had 2 chances to get carded. and it didn't happen either time. man, what's up with that? they used to card me at the freakin' movie theater for rated R movies less than a year ago. how do i not get carded for a drink? on one hand, yay for not having to put forth the extra effort. but on the other hand, do i actually look old now? or is there a third hand that says the server doesn't really give a crap?
tonight i went to choir practice. it was a change to be in the midst of lots of older people… various ages, from my age to who knows. but it was fantastic… harmonious. incredible. so if anyone's not busy on sunday night they want to hear a fantastic choir, come to trinity at 6 p.m. for 'hanging of the green.' or you can come sunday morning and hear us sing. or you go to your church. whatever is fine with me. but if you come to trinity, come say hey!
ok, so maybe that's it. but it seems bigger… and worse. but, that's ok. i'm kind of excited about turning 25. of course, i hate the fact that my birthday is right smack in the middle of christmas season. but again, it's ok as long as people follow suit with birthday things and not christmas things. if you're not a christmas baby, you should swap with us for one year… you'd sympathize with every one of us from here out. speaking of, i really hope that i have a lot to do for my birthday this year. last year's was boring, being in alex city for it. nothing to do. now, i'm back in birmingham, where there's tons to do. so… keep your calendar open somewhere near the 16th…
i can't believe it's almost thanksgiving. that's crazy to me. it seems like yesterday that i was at whelmed, 139, and even voting. where has november gone? and is it me, or has it seemed like it has rained the entire month now? geez. i could really do without more rain. ugh.
tonight, my cat did a major bombardment on a poor unsuspecting grasshopper that managed his way into the house. how he had stayed alive yet is still a miracle. may he rest in peace. yeah, that's my life. watching my cat… wow.
my best friend mollie is in town as of tonight! woohoo! hopefully she'll get to come downtown for lunch tomorrow, as i'm heading down to help out a friend with some filing. i'm so glad she's in town. everyone of my school buds are in town, but most are married and doing the double family gigs, so we won't actually get together until christmas. that makes me sad. but, i'll be looking forward to it.
now i'm off to bed. i must be old… i get tired at like 9:30 now, and it's a stretch to stay up this late. i'm an old timer.
oh, in case you were wondering, i went with the middle initial on the card.
bandwagon.
<lj-cut text="all you ever needed to know but never knew.">Firsts
First best friend: laura baswell
First car: 1983 buick regal. and it got stolen. i'll share the story one day.
First break-up: brian updike. we went out over the summer, and broke up first day back. did i mention we never saw each other during the summer?
First screen name: uaemily98
First self-purchased album: d.c. talk 'heavenbound'
First funeral: my grandmother, she died when i was 5
First pets: dog: rex, cat: smokey
First piercing/tattoos: my ears
First true love: jon
First enemy: lisa davidson. we played basketball, and i hated her then.
First big trip: alone? atlanta with my best friend melissa for 5 days during our senior year.
Lasts
Last cigarette: hmm. i don't remember, but it's been a while. maybe… no clue.
Last car ride: ride? not drive? wow… oh wait, now i remember. 5th amendment.
Last kiss: hmmm. about 3 years ago. hey matthew! ha ha.
Last good cry: wow, about a month and a half ago.
Last movie seen: in theaters? bridget jones 2 At home?under the tuscan sun
Last beverage drank: tea
Last food consumed: chicken caesar salad
Last crush: again, 5th amendment. unless i can count the choir candy. ha ha.
Last phone call: linda, my soon-to-be boss, asking what name i wanted on my business cards.
Last time showered: this morning.
Last shoes worn: wallabees
Last item bought: my suede blazer and some steve maddens… cheap cheap at the consignment shop
Last annoyance: scratched cd's
Last time scolded: that might be a while back. in fact, maybe too far than i'm willing to think.
Fashion stuff
Favorite place to shop: consignment shoppes and funky artsy places
Any tattoos or piercings: ears, 4 holes. used to be 7. but i had to take out a set at sh2, and then my cartilage piercing had to be lost about a month later.
Specifics
Do you do drugs: nope
What kind of shampoo do you use: herbal essences
What are you most scared of: creepy crawly things that are only 1/100 my size, snakes, spiders, failing
What are you listening to right now: butterfly boucher
Where do you want to get married: waterside, either the lake or beach
What would you change about yourself: i'd be about 5 sizes smaller, and have my long hair back.
Favorites
Color: red
Food: cheesecake and tomatoes
Subject in school: art history
Sports: hockey, football to watch, basketball to play
Have you ever
Given anyone a bath: when babysitting a kid
Smoked: guilty, but i really do think it's gross.
Bungee jumped: technically… the bungee egg thing that slingshots. talk about wanting to pee in my pants.
Made yourself throw up: ugh. i can't even let them stick one of those sticks part way in my mouth at the doctor, how would i do that?
Skinny-dipped: yep
Been in love: yeah
Made yourself cry to get out of trouble: too many times
Pictured your crush naked: yeah. but, with vulcan, you don't have to think too hard. ha ha.
Cried when someone died: yes
Lied: yes
Fallen for your best friend: hey again matthew!
Rejected someone: yeah
Used someone: yeah
Been rejected: yeah
Done something you regret: yeah
Last person
You touched: my cat zoe!
You hugged: melissa after on the border sunday night
You Imed: mallory messersmith!
You kissed: again, hey matthew!
Are you
Understanding: most of the time
Open-minded: more than i used to be
Insecure: more than i used to be… especially around intimidating people
Interesting: hmmm. i've never thought of myself that way, but friends say i am.
Hungry: yeah
Smart: right.
Moody: now? no.
Hardworking: when i like the project… but if not, deadlines can help that motivation.
Organized: very
Healthy: more than i've ever been!
Shy: more than i used to be
Attractive: in my opinion? yeah that'd be a big NO.
Bored easily: most of the time… sometimes i wonder if i'm the dictionary picture for A.D.D.
Responsible: most of the time.
Obsessed: again, i may be the picture for the dictionary entry for O.C.D.
Angry: not now.
Sad: well, the rain isn't helping.
Disappointed: in the weather.
Happy: woohoo! you know it!
Hyper: not at the moment.
Trusting: not as much as i used to be…
Talkative: most of the time… and i hate that.
Which is better
Coke or pepsi: diet pepsi
Flowers or candy: flowers… cala lillies
Tall or short: tall for me please.
Random
In the morning I am: sleepy, groggy, and not very talkative
I dream about: life, love, events that have already happened and take a different turn
What do you notice first: smile… eyes… laughter
Last person you danced with: myself, every morning when i get ready
Who makes you laugh the most: jonathon, my soon-to-be best-friend-in-law
Who makes you smile: wow… lots of my friends
Who gives you a funny feeling when you see them: colin firth. well, on screen.
Who do you have a crush on: not sure… i have interests… choir candy neal.
Who has a crush on you: right, that could never happen in my mind.
Do you ever
Sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone to IM you: no.
Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: no way… it's great not having ALL the pressure.
Wish you were younger: nope.
Number
Of times I’ve had my heart broken: 4 times
Of hearts I have broken: 7. i'm horrible, i know.
Of guys I’ve kissed: 14
Of girls I’ve kissed: none
Of continents I have lived on: 1
Of tight friends: by tight, i think super, so that'd be about 7
Of CDs I own: too many to need i'm sure
Current Music: by now, it's 'jolene' by mindy smith
Current Mood: exhausted now from all this typing.</lj-cut>
wretched rain.
i heard it said today that chivalry isn't doing just the right thing. it's doing the extra thing. boy do i agree. but it'd be nice if chivalry didn't seem dead. whatever happened to all the chivalry in the world? it'd be nice to see it again one day. it would make the world a better place.
anyways. so today the weather was all but chivalrous. yucko. i don't think i've driven in that bad of weather in a while. and today i was supposed to take some photos for my art project. apparently, my camera has decided to ensue a rebellion. it's sure not wanting to cooperate. and my stress level has gone through the roof because of it. deadline less than a month. and 4 projects are dependent upon photos that i need to take. and, weather that needs to agree. some of my photos turned out from the other day, but there were only a few good ones. dang having to take photos at night. they never turn out great. but you can check the ones that were just ok… i'm not completely happy with them, but they could work…
<lj-cut text="the not-so-bad photos."><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v178/DMCemily/myownpics/vulcanvertiS.jpg"> <img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v178/DMCemily/myownpics/vulcanheadshouldersS.jpg">
guess who… ha ha.
<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v178/DMCemily/myownpics/vulcanposeS.jpg">
ahhh! a poser! but she was way too cute to not take a picture of her.
<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v178/DMCemily/myownpics/lightandtreeS.jpg">
vulcan park.</lj-cut>
today hasn't been what i hoped it would be. this project is severely stressing me out. and it makes it worse to see the weather for the next few days. yuck. so friday, instead of shopping or having fun, i'll be shooting photos, God willing it will be nice and sunny.
maybe the weather is making me feel this yuck. and i really don't want to drive in this crap tomorrow. seriously. but i suppose i will. i have to write a paper when i get home. it's due tomorrow. i should have done it today… but. well, i'm sick of talking about the photos.
i'm very excited about the change of scenery i'll have in the matter of weeks. it should be fun. so much will change! school, work, driving patterns, money, time. i'm ready for it.
'could this be the day i'm waiting for?'
something made me really happy the other day. it's in doing something for others… i've been working on mary catherine's project, and it's way too fun. and messy. i think that's why i really like it. but it lets me be creative.
ok, i have to go read 'the wasteland' for class tomorrow. i'm out.
quizzy things.
<table style='font-family : Arial, Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; border-collapse: collapse; border: 1px solid black;' cellspacing='0' cellpadding='2' align='center'><form action='http://memegen.net/viewmeme.pl?meme=1074662660' method='POST'><tr><th colspan=2 bgcolor='#000000'><font color='#DDDD88'>Your love is… by <a href='http://www.hometown.aol.com/yoyogirl8910/'><font color='#DDDD88'>ChibiMarronchan</font></a></font></th></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your name is…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'><input type='text' name='Your name is…' value='Emily' size='20'></span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your kiss is…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>breath taking</span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your hugs are…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>to die for</span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your eyes…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>twinkle in the moonlight</span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your touch is…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>the only thing I desire</span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your smell is…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>amazing</span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your smile is…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>encouraging</span></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor='#333333' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #FFFFFF;'>Your love is…</span></td><td bgcolor='#DDDDAA' style='border: 1px solid black;'><span style='color: #000000;'>everlasting</span></td></tr><input type='hidden' name='un' value='ChibiMarronchan'><input type='hidden' name='meme' value='1074662660'><tr><td colspan=2 align='center' bgcolor='#000000'><input type='submit' value='Fill Out Your Answers and Try it!'></td></tr><tr><td colspan=2 align='center' bgcolor='#000000'><font size='-1' color='#FFFFFF'><a href='http://memegen.net/'><font color='#DDDD88'>Quiz created with MemeGen</font></a>!</font></td></tr></form></table>
